I found two copies of the urination so-called essay — one a marked-up draft noting “changes made”, the other an email reflecting the edits, to the Chicago Reader column “The Straight Dope”, which started like:
“Jun 14, 1996
“Dear Cecil Adams,
“In response to your column, ‘The Straight Dope’ in the January 12, 1996 Chicago Reader, I send you the following Urination Essay, written by me a few years ago. My brother, who owns this E-Mail Address, wants you to be aware it is I, not he, who wrote and sent the essay. That feeling is mutual. It was I, Dixon Stuelke, not my brother, who wrote and sent the following essay:
“The Yellow Stream by I. P. Freely
“by Dixon Mason”
I deemed it more fun to read the marked-up draft like a before-and-after. There’s only one edit to the email that’s not on the draft: I forgot to strike out the ickiest passage in the second paragraph, fourth page.
I wonder why “The Straight Dope” didn’t publish it.





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